Sunday, April 27, 2008

sir, you threw your words like we're buying it

If I concentrate hard enough, I feel like I can rewind time. Just for tonight, Allah, just tonight. I want to rewind time for that few seconds of ungraspable moment.

Just that one moment.

Where, we ran down the stairs just as I heard him exploded the word “sayang” to her. That sharp tone of rage in one word. He destroyed it all for us, he wasn’t a person anymore. When we ran, we stopped at the edge of stairs with a halt, not brave enough to step on the marble floor, that’s suppose to be our home. A safer ground. But, its like the marble floor was off limits in my head, the chillness of the white marble floor seemed to be ferociously hot like a burning coal so I wouldn’t dare to step more.

She came crying to me, calling our names, saying she’s living and that we must stay with him. Amid
the sudden movements and decisions, my brain went roaring and my heart swelled as she took the keys from it’s place and headed to the door.

It was all so fast, I couldn’t comprehend it. I couldn’t let go of her without going with her too.

Oh I wished I had pushed him and lead her out the door and into the car, but it’s like my brain didn’t work. I couldn’t even speak!!!

I tried saying something but my words came out short and wasn’t understandable.
The tears kept coming out of nowhere, its like I went on a tear rampage!
I can’t even say I want to go with her , I just kept holding her wrist and tried saying it.
Fuck!! the words didn’t come out.
Then he just had to came and blocked the door, and pleaded.

And I just had to ran up and tried to call for anyone’s help but wasn’t brave enough.

He couldn’t possibly know what love is, if he does he wouldn’t have done that, he wouldn’t have behaved like that. He has become some one I don’t know. You, sir had misused the term love.
This time I don’t think I can accept it, I couldn’t, not this time. Tonight it ends here, I couldn’t understand you anymore. I couldn’t accept your words, I couldn’t accept your love. Tonight, we cut all ties. I want her to fight you, tonight I want her to fight you in front of the judges and witnesses.

I just want this to stop.
I wan you to stop .
Just let go.
Let go of us.

I need to move on.
We need to move on.

For you sir, had became inhuman. You’re too bitter of it all. I’m truly confused and morose by what you had let life done to you.

so not anymore, i wouldn't accept when you said you love me.

“where did we go wrong?”


my life is like a frikkin yoyo, how did i get myself into all this?
i thought this only happens in the movies.

1 comment:

aristarionne said...

Irah? Is everything okay?

Screw that, sure sounds like it's not okay right now.

Look, I could only guess what's happening here, and there is a high chance of me guessing wrong.

But I hope whatever it is that you are all right. If you want to talk about this at all, message me okay?