Another night,another nightmare.

I saw you in my dreams again last night. You gave me another warm feathery kisses across the cheek gently as if doing so might scare me away. Oh the contrary I was pleased like a child getting the toy she has been harboring over for quiet some time. I don't understand why you keep coming to me in my dreams, but I rather not dwell on them too much. Maybe my subconscious mind is giving me a subtle hint of what I feel and how I should react to them. However, I refuse to act upon this hormonal needs for I now what reality have in store for me. These dreams, they are just wishful thinking mixed in with estrogens and bit of too much television.

Delighted as I am to be dreaming about your smile and kisses, I have been dreaming about my sister too. In my dreams, she always came home for the weekend all the way from Australia. The setting will always be a big dinner party with the whole brood, and I can't seem to ever have the time to speak to you alone because everyone else wants you to themselves too.

Although, last night's dream was an improvement. We laughed, ate and smiled a lot. Just like we used too. I can't believe I wouldn't be seeing your godawful pretty face until December.A whole year not hugging you.A whole year not fighting with you. A whole year not calling you names. A whole year not getting angry at you. A whole year not crying in your arms. A whole goddamn year not seeing you cry and give my shoulder to lean on.

I feel myself, changing with you not around. I have yet to learn if those changes are good or bad.

Insyallah they are for the better.